Spring Cleaning

The season of spring, with its reminders of new life all around us in nature, puts me in the mood of reflection. This reality of new beginnings, coupled with spending a few days sifting through the mementos accumulated over thirty years of marriage, and raising eight children puts me in a reflective mood. you begin to see the warp and woof of your life; a tapestry or collage of family, friends, places and events. these are the touch points of my life, but by no means all-inclusive. yet, they serve as a reminder that I am getting older, and also bring to mind all the gifts that God has so richly blessed me and our family with over the years.

Sifting through memory lane can be a daunting task. I need to brace myself for the onslaught of thoughts and feelings that are tied to each picture, or artifact. Pouring through photographs that are sequestered into shoe boxes in no particular order, adds to the roller-coaster of feelings that I experience. As I gaze at a photo taken in the early morning, I see myself twenty-five years ago, holding newborn Matthew, with sobbing Kerry 9age 4) and Brian (age 17 months). I don't know what my husband Al was thinking when he snapped this, but I am grateful to be reminded of the controlled chaos that a newborn brings to the family dynamic. from here I come across numerous high school graduation pictures, and these set me to marveling at the fast pace of time. I stumble across flocks of elementary school assignments and report cards, and I'm tempted to toss them, but something stays my hand. These aren't trash, I tell myself, rather they are irreplaceable pieces of lived experience. I come across similar mementos from my own parochial schooldays. Why is it that even after forty-five years, photos of classmates stimulate the immediate recall of names?

I began this spring cleaning to throw things away, but I'm finding that to be difficult, because attached to each card, picture or report card is a memory. These "things" are the tangible reality of a life well lived. I am reminded of Anne Lamott's words from her book Bird by Bird, "clutter is wonderfully fertile ground-you can still discover new treasures under all those piles" (28). I've decided that I need more file cabinets and photo albums to organize these memories.